Love Letters 1944-1953
September 7, 1952
Dear Maggie,
When my mother was alive, I told her I wanted my obituary to read: “If they say I’m dead, I’ve been buried alive.”
She hated this idea and said that I should stop doing things that would make her cry, even though
I’ve never seen her cry at anything in my life. And even then, I’d seen her live through much worse than my little joke. That was what made me mad about it.
My husband just laughed stiffly when I told him many years later. I know you don’t like it when I talk about my husband in my letters to you, but this time I’m talking about how utterly incompatible he and I are, so I thought you might be interested.
Edgar is not a funny person. He doesn’t say funny things or find joy in hearing them. He learned how to laugh solely to placate others and now that I know this I can barely stand to be around him. Luckily, the feeling seems to be mutual.
Nothing is more embarrassing than a woman who wants to go out with a bang but has no one to even watch. I just don’t want to go quiet and unknown.
You’ll come to my funeral, won’t you, my dear Maggie? I’m giving you tacit permission to cause as much chaos as possible. I’m begging you to cause as much chaos as possible. Truly, I’m on my knees. Tell them I’m not really dead or tell them you’re a ghost hunter feeling major ESP, declare your love for me, I don’t know. Do whatever you feel comfortable with.
Love, Betsy
July 7, 1953
Dear Elizabeth,
As you know, I’m still mourning the passing of my lovely wife, Margaret. The warm dinners you’ve brought for the kids and I have been so appreciated. I never realized how much she did while I was at work, plus with making Margaret’s arrangements… your small favors do not go unnoticed. Your speech at her service was touching.
While I cannot entirely repay your kindness, I can return some of it. Letters between you and my wife. I truly didn’t know what she was up to while I was at work. I’ve kept a few particularly graphic ones just in case, but so long as you continue to support us financially in our hard time, I see no reason why your friendship with my late wife need not remain private.
Warmly, Ronald Stanton
February 21, 1944
My Dearest Betsy,
You always ask me questions about the war, but that’s the only thing I can’t talk to you about. Frankly, it’s the only thing I don’t want to talk to you about.
You appear to me in dreams like an angel, the only thing I see in color, the only thing from my old life that I still completely remember.
I try not to think too hard about what I’d be doing with you if there was no war at all.
This is important, I’m sure they’re telling you that all the time at home. We’re doing great work on the frontlines. We’re going to defeat the greatest evil the world’s ever seen, my dear. After that, I’ll come home.
I miss you so much. Please think of me and know that I think endlessly of you.
All my love, Edgar
March 24, 1945
Dear Elizabeth,
This is your mother. Is it true that you’ve been receiving letter after letter from Edgar Milford? I’ve always thought he was a very nice boy and I’ve always thought you were too optimistic in ignoring him.
Elizabeth, you should accept his proposal if he asks. He’s a good man, I can tell. He’ll provide for you. He won’t hurt you. Please don’t hold out too long, sweetheart. I only want what’s best.
Love you, Betsy. Mama
April 12, 1945
My Dearest Betsy,
Let’s get married. Anyone could die at any moment but I promise I won’t if I know I have you to come back to. I won’t get any sleep until I get your answer, so please write back soon.
All my love, Edgar
October 11, 1949
Dear Mrs. Milford,
Welcome to the neighborhood! My name is Maggie Stanton, I live two doors down from you. It’s a quiet suburb, but it’s really lovely. There’s a ladies’ club that gets together at the church on Mondays if you’d like to come with me sometime.
Ronald, my husband, tells me to invite you and Edgar over for dinner as soon as possible. He just got a new grill and he loves to show it off.
I included some cookies, hopefully you’re not allergic to anything, please let me know if you are!
Sincerely, Maggie Stanton
October 12, 1949
Dear Maggie,
Thank you for the letter and for the cookies! You truly are a marvelous baker. I’ve sent along a loaf of banana bread - my mother’s recipe - I hope you enjoy it.
When can I see you?
Betsy
Mr. and Mrs. R. H. Hooper announce the marriage of their daughter
Elizabeth Samantha
to
Mr. Edgar Gordon Milford
Sunday, November twenty-fourth, Nineteen hundred and forty-six
Albright’s Grocery
General Merchandise
DATE 11/29/49
1 Milk - $00.82
2 Eggs - $00.79
3 Sugar - $00.43
4 Flour - $00.49
5 Butter - $00.73
6 Postage stamps - $00.03
SALES TAX $00.32
TOTAL $03.61
November 2, 1949
Dear Betsy,
I’m so glad you’re enjoying the ladies’ club. I’m enjoying having you there. Yes, I’d love to walk with you next week! Tea sounds lovely.
I actually have one last thing to ask you. I’ve ended up in charge of the bake sale, it’s our yearly fundraising event. Would you like to help me run it? The work isn’t too hard but we’d have to spend quite a bit of time together baking and planning. I’d be happy to provide plenty of tea to thank you.
Let me know, Maggie
Maggie’s Eulogy, Draft #15
None of you knew Maggie. You were her parents, her siblings, her children, her husband
She didn’t have to be anything she didn’t want to be to me and that’s how I know that I really knew her. You never had the chance to meet her. You told her who to be and so you never knew what she wanted you to know
You should mourn that she’s dead but also that you never knew her as anything other than what you needed her to be
July 30, 1945
My Dearest Betsy,
I imagine us, not too far in the future, in a beautiful town with a beautiful house and two or three beautiful children in a world that I made peaceful.
Hold out, my dear. Just a little while longer, I think. I think about you so much and soon I’ll find you and hold you.
All my love, Edgar
November 1, 1949
Dear Maggie,
The ladies’ club was thrilling! Thank you for taking me along last night. I know it’s just sewing and chatting but I realized it had been so long since I’d been around women without my husband or children.
There’s something so wonderful about women, isn’t there? We’re soft. People like to hold it against us or beat it out of themselves, but I think there’s something lovely about softness. Would you like to walk together to next week’s meeting too? You can stop in for some tea beforehand if you’d like.
Betsy
Maggie’s Eulogy Draft #27
I wish I’d had a whole life with Maggie. In a way, I wish I were standing in front of her, receiving her guests. We had a life together and now no one ever gets to know. Maybe we should check the casket one more time, make sure that no part of her is still trapped in there. A grieving widow gets to ask to see inside the casket, a neighbor does not.
Maggie’s Eulogy Draft #1
Maggie Stanton was my best friend. I will miss her so much. I loved her in a way I have never loved a person. I didn’t think it was possible
December 1, 1949
My Dearest Betsy,
I’m working late tonight. There’s no need for you to wait up for me with dinner. I know you’ve got your ladies’ club business in the morning and I want you to get a good night’s sleep.
When I come home to you late at night or see you sleeping early in the morning as I get ready for work, I am struck by the thought that you are still just as angelic as back when I could only dream of you.
This is not a time for heroic men. Well, maybe it is for the boys in Korea. We used to talk so much about what we’d do when we got back and now I spend all my time at work. This is not a time for heroic men, it’s a time for - I don’t know what exactly.
Know that I love you and think endlessly of you. Good luck with your ladies thing if I don’t see you awake before it happens.
All my love, Edgar
December 7, 1951
My Dearest Edgar,
Worry not, I think endlessly of you as well. I can almost feel the shadow of you when I fall asleep alone. I shut my eyes tightly and feel the way you would hug me to you and the way I would twist to bury myself in your strong chest. I can’t wait to see you again, my dear.
Isn’t it so odd, to go from writing the minutes in your meetings to notes declaring our love? I know you. I knew you before I loved you and that’s what makes all the difference now. I’ll withstand whatever you need me to.
Here I am now, thinking only of seeing you again on Monday morning. Worry not indeed, my dear.
All my love, Natalie
Maggie’s Eulogy Draft FINAL
Maggie Stanton was my neighbor. We were members of the ladies’ club together, we baked together, our children played together. She will be deeply missed. My kindest regards to those she is survived by; her husband, Ronald; and her children, Jack and Emma.
December 6, 1951
Dear Betsy,
I keep thinking of how we walked hand in hand back home from the meeting last night.
I was always told to hide my love from men until the right moment and to keep it closely guarded. Love from a woman to a man is meant to be rationed and made to be scarce. There seem to be far fewer rules when the other person in question isn’t a man. I love you, darling, not for anything but the fact that you make me happy. This doesn’t have to change anything, Betsy. I have more love than I know well what to do with.
Let me know what you think, Maggie
December 8, 1951
Dear Maggie,
I love you so much. I love you so much. I love you so much.
I love you so much, Betsy
Darby Sherwood is an active member of the Dramatists’ Guild and currently writes, directs and acts in Washington.
