Flu
Deep in winter, always Madame
Sosostris, hands paler than first light,
every reflective widow’s
blighted eye I pass as a ghost
might. The days hiding
underneath each wood plank, rats
gnawing through the piers,
beams, blind glass holding it all
together. The corridors,
waiting for the solstice to bear
spring tidings, promise that
warm winds will erase the stares—
back behind every mirror. Learning
to never ask about my future,
just as I have learned to love
with my mouth closed and words
unshuttered, love like prongs lending
another block of wood to a feeble fire.
When the snow softly beats the earth,
the woman who is known to be the wisest
in Europe whispers I love like the snow.
I pretend that she is not there
so that I may pretend that
I do not love at all.